Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Creature Comforts

In 24 days I won't work here anymore.

I actually liked this job a lot when I started. The work was interesting, I was challenged, and it was a great opportunity for someone who was fresh out of college. The problem was that I wasn't really interested in doing political/nonprofit work, and eventually it stopped being fun. I first started threatening to quit about a year ago, and when friends and family suggested that I make good on my threats and find a new job, I backpedaled.

"We're leaving in just a year!" I said.

"I don't want to leave the company in a lurch!" I said.

What I really meant was that I was afraid to change jobs. Even though I wasn't really happy, I was comfortable and in my world being comfortable is very important.

So I stayed and kept complaining. I know everyone got really sick of me saying how much I hated my job, and looking back on it, I really should have left a year ago. Even though there have been good times in the last 12 months, I think I would have left here with a better attitude if I'd handed in my resignation back in early 2005.

Since my boss has started looking for a replacement for me though, I've realized just how proud I am of the work I've done here. Reviewing the job description my boss is currently sending out in the hopes of finding my replacement, I'm a little intimidated. I do all that? Really? Damn!

And honestly, even though I'm counting down the days until I get to say goodbye to this place for good, I'm starting to get sentimental about it. Who will help my coworker with computer problems after I'm gone? Will the fax machine around the corner ever get fixed? Who's going to finally figure out how to program the time on our microwave? And, more to the point, who will my friends go to lunch with when I'm gone? What jokes will they share that I won't be a part of? What crazy things will I miss when I'm not in D.C. anymore?

Because really, I won't miss this job. I'll miss the people, the camraderie, and the random every-day stuff that makes me smile. I'll miss feeling this comfortable in a place and with a group of people. I'm sure I'll feel this way again about a different place and a different group of people, but it'll take some time. Until then, I'm going to keep counting down the days until I leave, but also try to keep in mind that I'm counting down to saying goodbye to a lot of things that at the end of the day make me very happy.

No comments: