Thursday, March 30, 2006

Being right

Class last night was awesome. There were seven of us plus our instructor, and while the primary focus of the session was to introduce us to some meditation techniques and talk about the overall goals of the series, one thing our instructor said really resonated with me. "There is more right with you than there is wrong with you."

One of the most startling things about the last 11 months has been coming to hate parts of my body. I've never been too concerned with my weight (I'm not exactly physically fit, but I consider myself to be on the slim side), and the only thing I've ever really wanted to change about how I look is my skin. I have terrible skin. But since we started TTC, and since we realized that hey, this isn't as easy for us as it is for most people, I've started hating my reproductive organs. I tell J sometimes that I'd like to beat up my ovaries, or give my uterus a good kick in the rear. Mostly it's in jest, but there's more than just a hint of seriousness too.

Last night, when my instructor made a point of emphasizing that for the most part our bodies are RIGHT, it hit a nerve, and I haven't been able to get that sentence out of my head since. I even wrote it on a sticky note and put it above my computer monitor. If nothing else, it's making me feel better today, and on some level that's all I can really control.

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