Breakdown

The RE can't see me until April 5. That's 4 weeks away, and while I understand that it's not unusual for new patients to have to wait awhile for apppointments, I'm having a breakdown right now. I'm so frustrated. I'm so angry. This move is screwing everything up. We'll only have one cycle under the RE's care before our move, only one cycle before we go somewhere with NO RE we can use with our insurance. One cycle before J's schedule means that he can't leave town for a year.

Part of me wonders if I'm being irrational. If I'm blowing things completely out of proportion. But I feel so out of control right now. It's taken us this long just to get a referral, and now they tell me that we won't even be here long enough to get past the initial diagnostic phase of treatment. It's like the universe is playing a cruel joke on me--letting me experience hope, and then snatching it away and laughing at me.

Why can't just one part of this process come easily?